This is the school where I taught for the last three years of my teaching career. It is east of the North Park area in San Diego.
The first week I was back from summer school at the Y was quite interesting. I moved into a new place and since I would be living alone I chose a place upstairs with only one door. There was a nice young couple living next door. I felt safe.
Since I was back "in circulation" the guys came out of the woodwork to ask for dates. I don't know what there is about not being available but it makes guys more interested. Or else all the other cute girls were now married, I am not sure.
Tuesday night at Mutual Richard asked if he could take me home but Danny had already asked me. Bob asked for a date and we set it up for Friday, Clinton asked me to go golfing with him and we set it up for Saturday, so Richard asked for a movie date for Wednesday. Norma had wanted to set us up but he did not wait. As soon as Sacrament Meeting on Sunday was over he rushed over and introduced himself. He asked if I would go to the Fireside with him. I was going with Danny.
But Richard and I actually spent the following Sunday afternoon at Balboa Park together also. I think this intrigued him that I was so popular (actually I wasn't, it was just kind of a one time week in my life). Anyway Richard and I really clicked. Actually I think it was two weeks before Labor Day we met.
A Surprising Interruption-Anyway Richard and I went to the movies Wednesday and when he brought me home and we were saying good night there was this person at the bottom of the stairs. I saw that it was Bill and said it was all right.
Bill came up and said he needed to talk to me so Richard said good night and left. What Bill needed to talk to me about was the fact the camera he had given me was actually one he needed to keep and he gave me another one.
He was planning on leaving this week for Harvard, we said goodbye again. I think this intrigued Richard also that I had an old boyfriend still hanging around.
A funny thing happened.
A funny thing happened.
When Bill left for Harvard, he sent me a dozen roses and it was on the table under the mirror of my apartment. When Richard came to pick me up for a date, he had a single rose that he handed to me. Then he walked over to the mirror while I went in the other room to pick up my sweater. I noticed he looked at the mirror at himself and never even noticed the roses. I didn't say anything. However, a single red rose became our form of affection from then on.
One thing I had learned in my college dating is that unless I really liked the guy I could not stand to have them even touch my arm and I definitely was not going to hold hands with them. Thus there was never any misunderstanding about how I felt. I managed to date, stay friends and stay away from messy situations.
Easy To Love-With Richard I was holding his hand the first day and felt we had known each other forever. He was a 'take charge' guy, which I loved, he made me feel he would take care of me and he was very sweet.
One thing I had learned in my college dating is that unless I really liked the guy I could not stand to have them even touch my arm and I definitely was not going to hold hands with them. Thus there was never any misunderstanding about how I felt. I managed to date, stay friends and stay away from messy situations.Easy To Love-With Richard I was holding his hand the first day and felt we had known each other forever. He was a 'take charge' guy, which I loved, he made me feel he would take care of me and he was very sweet.
He also made me feel from the beginning that he was in love with me and even though he always liked to stare at a pretty girl I was not intimidated by that, much.
We talked and talked and talked as we shared everything about our former life. I was also impressed with the way he treated others, his attitude toward work and his testimony of the Gospel. There was not much to not love.
We were actually at BYU at the same time for a short period. He was friends with the Law girls downstairs from me. I collected cleaning from them. But it was not time for us to meet evidently. That was in 1954.
We were actually at BYU at the same time for a short period. He was friends with the Law girls downstairs from me. I collected cleaning from them. But it was not time for us to meet evidently. That was in 1954.
The next week the neighbors told me this guy keeps stopping by and rushing up the stairs to see if I was home. It was Richard. And that was the way it was. Richard saw me as this girl he wanted and who might get away with some other guy and he was in full pursuit.Actually we had so very much in common, similar backgrounds and he had had a broken romance the previous spring also. He wanted me to meet his mother and soon we were exclusive and I did go to Las Vegas to meet his mother on Labor Day weekend. She was very suspicious of me I thought.
In a letter home, this is what I wrote my folks about Richard, actually I called him Dick in the first letter home but had soon changed it to Richard...probably because we called my brother Dick.
"Age 28, Graduated in Finance and Banking from the Y, Mission in Texas, 2 years in Navy, home is in Las Vegas, one Mom, Father dead, two married brothers, works for a Savings and Loan Co. Wants to go into real estate. loves San Diego, has white Ford convertible, loves to eat, speaks well in Church and has practical attitude about things. Sowed wild oats in his youth, I believe. Fun, ambitious, going to start planning a house and build it for an investment. He's dark, has thinning hair, nice dresser and young looking and acting (fun) but mature. Now you know as much as I do."
In the same letter, I also mentioned golfing with Clinton and that it was hard to see Bill again at first and know we'd have to part again. "I'm sure everything is all right now though. He's been so sweet and kind to me--makes it harder than ever. Surely glad I got back in the ward activity and know where I'm going."
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Richard decided we should marry now and so the plan was made. He was the leader in our relationship at that time, for sure. We would go straight from school on Friday, get married by the Bishop and have the weekend in LA and back again Monday morning for work.
Unfortunately he told his brother and Scott came unannounced from Las Vegas with Mom and family in tow and arranged a dinner and cake at a hotel. It was all just too embarrassing for me but both Scott and Richard were trying to make their mother happy I think. I am not sure when I told my parents, it is all kind of hazy in my mind. I do have a copy of the letter Richard wrote to my Dad saying we would go to the Temple in the near future.
Richard wrote a week after we married to my parents: "Thank you for your nice letters and all your kindness. It has been nearly a week since Jan and I were married and I am just now beginning to realize what a really wonderful wife I have. I'm glad that you were able to pray her away from all her previous suitors...Jan and I are very happy, but we look forward to the day we are married as we should be with both our parents present. It's not so important where you're at--as the direction you're going. Thank you again for all your kindness and especially for Jan." Love, Richard.
Richard wrote a week after we married to my parents: "Thank you for your nice letters and all your kindness. It has been nearly a week since Jan and I were married and I am just now beginning to realize what a really wonderful wife I have. I'm glad that you were able to pray her away from all her previous suitors...Jan and I are very happy, but we look forward to the day we are married as we should be with both our parents present. It's not so important where you're at--as the direction you're going. Thank you again for all your kindness and especially for Jan." Love, Richard.
The other thing that was nice is the many mother's of the class giving me a wedding present! In hindsight it probably would have been better for us to wait until Christmas when we would have time for a reception and all. I never have had a well-stocked kitchen, ha.
But in another way I was relieved not to have a whole wedding and reception planned around me. I never wanted to be the center of attention in that kind of situation unlike many young women who plan for their dream wedding all their life.
Later the PTA Board gave me a surprise shower as well as all the gals at church so I really did get many lovely presents.
A Move for Me-It was decided we would move into Richard's apartment and his roommate would find another place. When we were cleaning my apartment before we moved out I thought it was clean, but Richard got on his hands and knees and redid the floor. His mother had taught him well, he really knew how to scrub a floor.
And that would be how we would handle our next apartment in Pacific Beach. We found a place we could manage and I would tend the yard and Richard would scrub the kitchen floor and take the laundry to the laundromat. We were both happy. He hated yard work and I loved it and he was really good at the cleaning bit.
Other things I learned about him was that he was in college the same year Marilyn started in 1950 but he was so poor he didn't enjoy college. He enjoyed being part of the social units and had no extra money for the clothes, dates, car, etc that was important to him.
So he joined the Navy and then came back to college on the G I Bill. His mother still wanted him to go on a mission and so he did and then back to college again. He did tell me about when he gained his own testimony and actually wanted to go on that mission himself, not just for his mother.
When we married he was making $300 a month as an appraiser and I was making $5000 a year for 10 months of teaching.
So we met two weeks before Labor Day 1959 and on October 23, 1959 we were married. When Richard died on November 27, 1996 we had been married 37 years and one month.
This is a picture with some of our San Diego North Stake friends--probably around the mid 70's. I was wearing my favorite dress. It was an ethnic dress from India which I bought in a little shop in La Jolla. Richard always had a big smile on his face.
